Dear Lucasfilm,
I am writing to express my deep frustration and disappointment with the original Star Wars series. As a filmmaker of the highest caliber, I am disgusted by the lack of authenticity and attention to detail in the original films.
First of all, the acting is subpar at best. Mark Hamill's wooden performance as Luke Skywalker is an insult to the craft of acting, and Carrie Fisher's princess is a one-dimensional damsel in distress. The dialogue is clunky and awkward, and the special effects are laughably bad by today's standards.
But the real kicker is the story itself. The hero's journey is hackneyed and unoriginal, and the villains are caricatures with no depth or nuance. The Force is a ridiculous concept that is never properly explained, and the whole thing is just a mess of cliches and tropes.
That's why I have decided to take matters into my own hands and direct a complete remake of the Star Wars series. With my vision and expertise, I will bring a level of sophistication and authenticity that the original films sorely lacked. I'll make sure the acting is top-notch, the dialogue is snappy and clever, and the special effects are mind-blowing.
And most importantly, I will give the Star Wars universe the respect it deserves. No more silly lightsaber duels or childish space battles. I'll delve into the deeper themes of the story and bring a level of complexity and depth that George Lucas could never dream of.
So Lucasfilm, get ready for the Star Wars series you always deserved. And may the force be with me.
Sincerely,
Wes Anderson
